What?
by A.D. Grey
Summary: Yea... I was totally bored. I had help from my brother though. It's just some stuff that we thought would happen if so and so happened. R&R! This is my first fanfic by the way. Enjoy!
1. Sneezing!

Authors note: Okay, this is my first fanfic. Me and my lil bro were playing Halo 2 and we got this freakin funny idea about what would happen if so and so happened to a spartan. It was soooo funny when we did this. We were both sugar high. this is my first fanfic so don't burn me badly pleeeease!!!! You can flame me if you want whatever floats your boat.

Disclaimer:Obviously I don't own any of characters from Halo or anything Halo related.

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John was looking at his fellow spartans as they ate. He looked down at the slop infront of him. While on a mission the food totally sucked. After they were all done eating they all put on their helmets and sat there in the covenant ship they took over.

"Hey Linda?" John asked while looking at the female spartan.

"What so you want John?" Linda replied while looking at him.

"You're too quiet. You usually yap away like no tomorrow."

"Umm. I think Somethings wrong with me. Happy?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well, I keep getting a tingly feeling in the bridge of my nose."

Umm. Your nose?"

"Yes! Didn't you hear me the first time?"

"It's probably something stupid!" Fred, who had been listening to the conversation, said.

"I didn't ask you!" Lind said annpyed.

"Or maybe it's some sort of disease!" Will yelled.

"Ahh!!!! Get away from me! I'm clean!" Fred yelled while running away from Linda.

"Ohh come on! It's probably nothing. I think." John said while slowly walking away from Linda.

"Come on you guys! There is nothing wrong with me! Wait. Somethings happening. My nose is tingling even more!" Linda said. The others couldn't see her expresion because she had her helmet on.

"Let's watch!" Fred said while producing popcorn out of thin air.

"How did you do that?" Will asked confused.

"I don't know. I've been able to do it since I was little." Fred answered.

"Sweet! Let me have some!" Will said while taking a handful of popcorn.

"Are you allright Linda." John asked at a safe distance.

"Umm. Yea! The tinglings... wait. AAAHH!! AH! AAAAHHHCHHHOOOOO!!!!!" Linda sneezed. The others burst out laughing realizing what was going on.

"All you had to do was sneeze!" Fred said while trying to stop laughing.

"Like OMG!!!! AHHH! I have fat green, yellow, and slimey boogers on the inside of my helmet. EEEEEEEEWWWWWW!!!! They're sliding down my helmet. EEEEWWW!! Now they're touching me!! AAAHHHH!! GETTHEMOFFGETTHEMOFFGETTHEMFFGETTHEMOFF!!!!!!" Linda was yelling this while running around waving her hands. The others were looking at her and then burst into laughter.

After about two hours of doing this Linda fainted from screaming so much and Will, Fred, and John finally stopped laughing.

"Should we help her?" Fred asked. They all looked at eachother then all at once they said, "NAAHH!!!" and started giggling.

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Yea. I was really sugar high. But, it might not be that bad! Or it might be that bad. Depends on how you much you people do or don't like it. So, reveiw please!!!!

-Grey


	2. Buritos!

**A/N:Woohoo! I'm happy because I got FOUR reviews! But, seriously, I got like 44 hits and only 4 reviews! Come on people! Humor me or something! Even if you're going to flame me, then review! For the love of all that is good! PLEASE REVIEW!!!!**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing Halo related. If I did, then it would totally be different.**

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The spartans were all eating in the cafeteria. Today was bean burito day! Freds favorite!

"I love todays meal!" Fred said with a mouthful of beans and tortillas. His food was spraying at the other spartans as he talked.

"Eat with you're mouth closed you pig!" Kelly said as she looked at him in disgust.

"But it's just so good!" this time big chunks went flying out of his mouth and onto the table.

"You're going to regret eating so many burito's Fred." Will said while looking at his tray loosing all of his appetite.

"Are you going to eat those?" Fred asked while looking at his fellow spartans. Will, Kelly, John, and Linda looked at each other and pushed their trays towards Fred. He smiled at them revealing bean covered teeth.

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So, at the moment our good spartans are practicing in the middle of the woods practicing in their MJOLNIR armor. Fred was about to jump out of a tree and land on Kelly when something happened. He breathed in deeply through his nose. I mean REALLY deeply. He stopped and fell out of the tree one of his hands going to his throat and the other one going up in the air.

Kelly told the others over the COM that something was wrong with Fred. The other spartans came as quick as they could. When they got there Fred said something.

"Air! Need...air!...Help!" Fred said while gasping. John stood over them and opened Fred's visor. They all saw Fred's face fill with relief as he breathed in fresh air.

"What's you're problem?" John asked confused.

"Umm. N-nothing! Ehehehe." Fred's cheeks began to turn pink.

"Awww! Is mister big bad Freddy-weddy embaressed?" Linda asked as if she were talking to a baby. Fred's checks turned a brighter pink this time. The others started to laugh at Fred.

"Let's just keep practicing!" Fred said as he put his visor down.

So, after a few hours later the same thing happened. Except this time no one did anyhting until Fred Stopped moving. Will took his own helmet off and then took Fred's off. When he did his nostrils widened and he got tears in his eyes. He turned a sickly green and jumped back from Fred while plugging his nose.

"Oh dear God! For the love of mercy that smells so bad!" Will said and looked at Fred as if he were some sort of giant machine of destruction.

"What's wrong?" Kelly asked concerned. She was about to take her helmet off too, but Will stopped her. He shook his head franticaly as if a gas bomb just went off.

"Trust me on this one Kelly. You DON't want to do that." Will said as he put his helmet on. He breathed in deeply as if the air was sweet honey.

"Is it that bad?" John asked.

"I told that dumb fucker that he would regret eating so many buritos!" Will said. When he sad that it clicked to the other spartans. They all began laughing and left poor Fred there to wake up all alone.

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**So, here's the second chapter. I hope you like it! And remember REVIEW!!!! There was probably many typos, but oh well. I except any reviews. Flames, randomness. The whole lot!.**

**-Grey**


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